“SWEET 16″ BIRTHDAY
It’s your sweet 16!!!! Be the most popular kid in school by featuring your fabulous 16th birthday party on national TV!!! Does your Dad want nothing but the BEST for you at your “Sweet 16th” birthday celebration? If you or someone you know is turning 16 in July, August, or September and wants to add to the extravagant party plans, please contact us ASAP at castingfoodnet@gmail.com

“WEDDING PROPOSAL”
Want to give the proposal of a lifetime on national TV? Are you ready to propose to your girlfriend but just not sure how to make it special and memorable?!! Let us help create the perfect surprise proposal dinner party for you and your soon to be bride. If you or someone you know is ready to pop the big question please contact us ASAP at castingfoodnet@gmail.com

“MOTHER/DAUGHTER-N-LAW”
Are you at odds with your overbearing mother-n-law? Does she always seem to know best? Do you want to prove once and for all you can throw the picture perfect party in hopes to ultimately please her? If so, please contact us ASAP at castingfoodnet@gmail.com

“ARE YOU GETTING MARRIED?”
Do you want your dream wedding on TV? Are you a perfectionist who will you stop at nothing for the perfect event? Are you getting married in the next few months and need a Chef to cook for the ultimate wedding reception? If so, please contact us ASAP at castingfoodnet@gmail.com

Yesterday I spoke on ABC News Now about the top things college doesn’t teach you about the work world. The story was in response to a York College survey that found recent college grads lack sorely in most areas of professionalism– yet have a huge sense of entitlement! The school is now offering professionalism classes. But can professionalism really be “taught”? Isn’t it something you only learn once you’re out IN the working world? Here’s a quick recap of the tips I shared:

1. A nice degree is good, but not everything. Employers need resourcefulness, not book smarts. Figure out how to solve your boss’ problems, and you’ll succeed.
2. The work world is not a meritocracy. It’s not like school where grades are the ultimate measure of success. The work world is unfair. Favoritism exists. Nepotism exits. You need to cultivate mentors and allies in order to get ahead.
3. Looks matter at work. Flip-flop and jeans culture is misleading. Colleagues do judge you by your appearance, period. Dress for the job you want when anyone who matters is watching.
4. Forget so-called “work life balance.” Gen X & Y have been sold a bill of goods that you can “have it all” early in your career. You can leave early everyday to go to the gym if you want, but you won’t be on the fast track.
5. Start asking for more money now. Or you might lose out big over time. A study showed that women who consistently negotiate salaries earn at least $1 million more over their careers. By not negotiating a first salary, you can lose more than $500K by age 60.
6. Don’t get stuck on the “dream job” now. It’s a bit unrealistic in this economy– and it’s more important to find anything that’s relatively interesting to you– and will help you build skills. You can always “spin it” later on!

What elements does an item of clothing need to look expensive even when it’s not?

As a shopper, you should look for good fabric–how it feels when you touch it–and try the piece on to see how it’s constructed. You still might have to get it altered for a little more cost, but tailoring helps the piece look richer right away. Also, check the stitch. If a designer uses a very thin thread, it looks much cheaper than a nice, thick thread. You hear about thread count with sheets, and it’s the same with stitches. If the thread is thicker, I find it makes the garment look richer. Those are little touches I try to give to my [Macy's] collection.

What did you learn back as an intern at Rocawear that prepared you for running your own business?

I learned so much! I think when you work in every department, even departments you don’t like, you learn to appreciate every position.  Working in, for example, the mailroom and in marketing, I learned seemingly little things like how much messengers cost and what time FedEx closes. But those are the things that you actually need to know to run your own company. Also, I’m used to the long hours because I did intern. Now, I don’t mind the hours because I’m working for myself.

You recently told Vogue that you don’t make the gym an utmost priority given your busy schedule as a mom of two daughters.  How do you keep it all together, so to speak?

It’s not easy. I do take it one day at a time, and try to make time for myself, literally just “mind-melting.” Some people call it meditation; I call it mind-melt. Everyday for a few moments (not even 10 minutes if I don’t have it) I either talk to myself or, since I’m a bit spiritual, I talk to God, just trying to put everything into alignment. I also do deep breathing. All of these things sound so corny that I hate kind of listing them, but if you try it when you’re alone–just a deep breath, or sitting up straight–it works. It calms me, and I’m able to be more present for the people that deserve it, like my two little girls.  They deserve a really active, present mom. So, that’s what keeps me going.

To learn more about Rachel, visit www.rachelroy.com.

Photo Credit: Barry Williams

“We’ll go through the whole interview, and I’ll say, “I have one last question. I don’t work with assholes. Are you one?”

Some say, “What a great question! I want to work in a place that’s like that.” But you’d be amazed at how many others hear that question and look like they’ve just been caught. Their expressions say: I guess I’m an asshole.

Bold, and brilliant!

Hi Becky! Many offices have some kind of policy or procedure regarding when the fridge is cleaned out– e.g. the office manager/receptionist sends out a mass email once a month announcing it’s fridge D-day.  If something’s visibly rotting and stinking in there, feel free to throw it away and not feel guilty, but I wouldn’t take it upon yourself to just go through the fridge/freezer and throw everyone’s stuff away if it’s not your job! That’s a quick way to get everyone mad at you. Better course of action is to alert the office manager or powers-that-be that the fridge could use a clean out. (And if there isn’t already someone in charge of that, it could be a great way to take initiative and volunteer yourself!)

The stunning and talented Rachel Roy was in Atlanta a couple weeks ago to promote her fab new reasonably-priced line at Macy’s, Rachel Rachel Roy. It was an honor to meet her (and sign a copy of the book for her!!). Watch for our interview in the June newsletter (you can sign up on www.debrashigley.com)– she shared some great insights on how to look rich for less, what she learned as an intern that’s made her a better businesswoman, and managing it all as a mom of two.

Photo credit: Barry Williams / Macy’s

Here’s a recap of the tips:

Less is More at the outset. Don’t just bombard someone with a long spiel talking about yourself! That’s the stuff that comes across as really fake. Keeping it simple helps things be more organic. Smile, and maybe start off with a genuine compliment, such as “I love your shoes!” or “I’ve admired your work for a long time!” Compliments are great conversation starters and help build that initial rapport. Also, accept that if you are in a schmooze situation it is going to be a little bit business-like. Just go with it.

Have a Schmooze Action Plan. Nobody just magically has interesting things to talk about all the time! Before an event, gather up three nuggets you can discuss–kind of “pop culture currency” you can contribute. How? Read a few magazine articles, stories on well-known people/trends, or a couple chapters of a popular book. Think about great new restaurants. Or movies. And of course, celeb gossip, American Idol and reality tv– which are all becoming staple dinner party topics. The point is having a few stories or insights to share that aren’t just about your work and life! Sidenote, avoid talk of politics, race, or religion, but again context is key. Obviously if you’re at a political fundraiser, politics is going to come up- but be tactful!

Avoid having a straight-up “elevator speech”. That can come across as very insincere, and off-putting, like you’re just selling something. Instead, take the five bullets/tidbits about yourself you want to share-and let them drop into the conversation kind of one at a time.

Ask Questions. It’s interesting, when you ask someone questions about him or her self, it actually can make them come away from the conversation with a more favorable impression of YOU. Maybe that’s because people just love to talk about themselves! If you’re talking to your boss or a senior colleague, sure you can ask about work projects, industry news-but try to branch out. Ask about his/her kids, vacations, weekend plans.

Learn to make a graceful exit. What if you’re stuck talking with someone you don’t like? Smile and nod, and be pleasant. You don’t want to be impolite. Here’s where you bring out plain old small talk— neutral subjects, like the weather, how great the food is, sports, if you’re into sports. Give it maybe five minutes, and then make a graceful exit. Say something like, ‘It was great chatting, I think I’ll walk around/mingle now/grab a drink”. Or, say you have to go to the restroom!

Don’t be negative. Sometimes when people get nervous or anxious, our instinct is to complain–or share TOO MUCH INFORMATION. Have some boundaries. Don’t speak negatively about your husband or wife when they’re right there! Don’t talk about your financial problems. Or how much you hate your job. Talk like this can make those around you uncomfortable. In general, try to keep it upbeat and positive.

With the controversy over the Lane Bryant ad shown above, people are again talking about what’s appropriate and what’s not when it comes to cleavage.  I once asked a wise woman if cleavage is appropriate in the workplace and her response was, “Well, it depends on your definition of cleavage.” Touché. There are certainly different kinds of cleavage, and in the workplace, all of them are pretty much a “No”– except for when it comes to the toes! Here are some other quick cleavage do’s and don’ts:

• Boob cleavage at work: For work, unless cleavage is part of your job description (e.g., you’re a bartender!), I say go for décolleté — a ‘shadow’ of boobage, rather than even one inch of crack. It’s simply too distracting otherwise. Also, as the warm weather approaches, avoid flimsy camisoles or shells, even underneath a suit.  Anything that looks too much like lingerie is better left to the bedroom, not the boardroom.
• Cleavage at the beach: There’s a new trend of “tush cleavage” in which you show the top part of your rear a la Kim Kardashian in this photo. I witnessed a bit of this a few months ago when I was in Rio — where the bathing suits are famously itty bitty– and even then, most of the time, the tops were small, whereas the bottoms gave complete coverage. Bottom line (sorry, couldn’t resist!): only the very bold should try it! And up top, you want a bathing suit that covers 75 percent of your “girls.”
• Toe cleavage: This refers to when you can see the little crack where your toe joins your foot in certain shoes. It used to be you shouldn’t show toe cleavage in office shoes, but that’s outdated– not to mention virtually impossible with most low-vamp, fashion-forward pumps!